Slow Creep

WHY am I so lucid and focused at 4am???

I woke up a number of times last night!  I really hate when that happens!  Nothing stirred me. I just woke up.  And as soon as I did, my brain ran out of the gate like a horse at a horse race.

First thing I started thinking was how my morning was gonna go.  I have to take my car in, but I need to work out.  I can't really do both without it taking a major chunk of time out of my day.  Then I started thinking about my day and all the stuff that needs to be done.

As I rounded the first corner my brain started obsessing about business decisions I made and a few more that are waiting on me.  My business needs to move forward, but it won't go anywhere unless I start pursuing a few angles.

As I rounded the next bend, my mind went towards money that was spent that might have been a bad investment, and how many hours it would take to shift one project over to another.

My mind was at full speed as it came around the last bend, heading toward the finish line strong, with thoughts of the kids and their upcoming schedules with dance, school and everything else.

I calmed myself down enough to dose off for another hour so I could wake up at 5 and start all over again!!

This morning when I got up, all that worrying did nothing for me but raise my anxiety level for the day and make me tired!

As I looked around my room, with clothes piled in every corner, I realize that the symptoms are staring me in the face.

Somehow, my life has become a bit of 'the tail wagging the dog' (as Dr. Phil says) and I need to spend a little time getting more organized!!  (a continuous theme in my life).

It's called the slow creep.  When you don't take care of things, little by little they start to overwhelm you.  And next thing you know, you have PLENTY to think about (or worry about as it were) at 4 in the morning!!

So, today I will make a list to start chipping away at my anxieties and give myself less to think about in the middle of the night.


But something tells me, it's not going to keep me from waking up in the middle of the night.

I just wish at those times I could think about puppies and kitties and things that make me happy instead of torturous and bothersome tasks.

School's almost out.  I'll be thankful for the reprieve....at least for a while.  Until the 'slow creep' becomes my children who are bored with summer.  Egads...... 

I guess it's always gonna be something, isn't it?

Happy Monday!