Judging and bosses

I met with my boss yesterday.  I had some issues that needed addressing and he was kind enough to meet with me.

It all seemed to go pretty well,  but the bottom line is he is the boss, and he let's me know it.  Subtly....however concretely.

I have had many bosses over my life.  Some good and some not so good.  I have never really been intimidated or scared by any of my bosses.  If I'm doing something wrong, I usually know it.

The only time I get nervous, is evaluation time.  I HATE that time of year.

It's like judgement day no matter how good your are doing.  You walk in and sit down, and across from you feels like your future lies in someone elses hands.  It's an awful feeling every time.

Thankfully, with age, it gets a little easier.  But no matter how old I get, I hate being judged.

Sometimes judgement is simply authoratative.  Someone has to do it.  Like in a job. 
Sometimes, you are judged based on your actions.

We all do it at some point in our lives.  We all judge others on some level.  We judge someones actions, or an event, or....whatever!!!

Judgement is something I try to teach my kids about.  In my opinion, when you judge others, you are basically stating that YOU would be perfect or at least better than "they", whom you are judging.

So it's very important to take a step back.  And it's always hard to take a step back.

I remember one time being in Target.  I watched this woman walk by with her kid (who must have been about 4 or 5) and she was verbally brow beating this kid.  And I was so taken aback, I stopped and stared at her.  And I literally had to tell myself, "I will not judge her based on the 20 seconds that I've seen her".   I was so affected by it that is shakes me to this day.

But fast forward with my own kids and I know others have felt the same way about me.

One day I was a Wal-mart with my mom and the girls.  Avery was young and decided to have a complete meltdown.  She was being very loud in the store, so I took her out to the van and I locked her in the car seat and opened the doors so we could breathe) and I sat in the front seat staring forward trying to calm myself down.  SHE was screaming the whole time.  She wouldn't calm down. 
As we were sitting there, the guy was getting in his car next to us and I caught his eye and he gave me a look like I was abusing my child.  I was in a fit myself at that moment, but if I had let go, I would have ripped him a new one just for that look.  But I realized he had NO idea what had preceeded and so I let him have his own thoughts and go his way!

You TRULY have no idea what it is to be a parent....until  you are a parent!!! 

My mom has a saying that I play over in my head, "Sweeten your words with sugar, for some day you may have to EAT them!"

And...I have eaten plenty!!!

But I have also learned. 

I am slow to judge.  I see other peoples kids and I have no idea what is going on at home.  I have been blindsided by friends divorces that answered SO many questions. 

As for my boss, I did judge him a bit harshly, and he set the record straight.  I am thankful for his time, and I am duelly reminded, that HE is the boss!!!

So be it!

Happy Tuesday!