Dear Daughters

Dear Daughters,
Life is hard.  It's a lot of figuring stuff out and a lot of mental negotiations.  People aren't always nice, and they don't always do the right thing.  You can't control what others do to you.  But you can control what you do in return.

My mother gave me the best advice of my life when I was 18.  I was dealing with people in a new job and I mentioned that one lady was "difficult".  She told me "There's a prick in every bunch" (she was referring to flowers as a metaphor for people). She was right.

As I entered different jobs, I found one every time.  Someone who is self righteous; someone who lives and dies by their job; someone who is oblivious; someone who is cut throat; someone who just doesn't care about how they affect anyone else.

In all my life, I never tried to control them or change them.  I simply tried to figure out what made them tic and rolled with it.

To fight what is, is a futile battle.  To roll with it, makes the ride a bit easier.  And not every ride is the same.

In some cases you will be the difficult one.  Deal with it.  But realize that your actions can always affect another.  It is up to you whether you make that choice a positive or a negative one.

Your support system is very important.  Build your foundation of friends and hold them tight.  Be there for them, and they will be there for you.  And if one falls astray (as will most certainly happen), be kind and roll with it.

That said, don't ever let anyone treat you badly.  But in return treat others as you wish to be treated.  Don't accept less from others than you are willing to give of yourself.

Life is confusing and hard.  Patience and understanding is necessary.

Look at the world around you with interest instead of judgement.  You will find it more intriguing and less depressing.

Love deeply, laugh passionately, forgive wholeheartedly.

My advice doesn't come overnight.  It comes from lifelong trials.

Remember, you cannot control what others do to you.....but you can control how you respond.  Choose wisely!

Love,
Your Mother!