Epiphany

How old were you when you found out your parents were.....not perfect?

(Gulp)

Hope I didn't spoil it for anyone. 

I was probably in  my late 20s.  I'm a late bloomer.  Yes, I had suspected it in my teens when I became all knowing and they become dumber than dirt.  But that happens in teen years, no?

Now, to clarify what "Perfect" meant in my world; it was that they knew everything, had all the answers, and didn't have any problems.  (yes, I had high expectations put on those poor people).

I believed most of what they said, and took it as truth without challenging it.  I never had a reason to challenge it, because more often than not, I didn't care.

But then when I started having seriously different opinions than my parents, it was really weird.  I found myself debating them at times thinking they were off their rocker.  But then there were times, I just didn't say a word, because after I heard what they had to say, I challenged my own thinking as though maybe my information was wrong?

Growing up is such a mixed bag.  

I really liked when Aspen said to me the other day, "I don't want to grow up.  Grown ups are BORING!"  Can't argue with that logic.   If it were in my power, I would keep her 10 years old forever.  But then I would have to not age as well!!

However, growing up offers freedom from your parents.  A chance to spread your wings and apply what you have learned!  It gives you the chance to fall as well....and learn from it.

We can't be attached to our parents forever.  We have to grow, and we have to move on.  But we have to realize that we need to learn our own way and find what we love and realize that our parents may have different opinions....and that is just fine. 

My major epiphany was when I had children.  All of a sudden, I realized that my mom didn't "suck" (not that I thought she did, I'm just sayin').  I realized she was doing her best with what she had, to raise 5 kids.   And all of a sudden, I looked at my husband, and realized my dad did many of the same things.  He was doing his best with what he had to provide for his family. 

And I was so very thankful for them.

As a parent, I keep looking for that guidebook to get me through my every day with kids.  Every day is different.

Now that I have kids; and I still have my mom in my life, I'm thankful to hear from her the many stories; from her perspective, about how she got through it.  I can finally see her point of view, and realize, in many ways, she did better than me. 

Our kids don't get to pick their parents.  I'm sure they would all look very closely before settling back down with us.  But as long as my kids know I am not perfect, I do the best I can with what I have....then I'm okay with that. 

And, they know they are loved.

I'm thankful for all my parents mistakes.  I'm thankful for everything I have been given.  But most of all, I'm thankful my parents weren't perfect!

Happy Sunday!