Sinking boat

Ever react in a way you wish you could change?

I try my hardest not to go there.  I will bite my tongue, agree, or simply disengage, before going there.

Yesterday was different.

In evaluating my behavior, I realize, I could have done something different.  But with what was going on in my mind during the (lets call it a discussion), I am not sure I could have changed my behavior.

I was talking to a co worker, who was somewhat new.  I think she is a lovely person.  Delightful, sweet and caring.  Those are great traits.

I have worked with her once before, and I was there way longer than I should have been due to her learning curve.  I was very (VERY) patient (she had me there an extra hour that I didn't get paid for), as I have been in the same situation and given the same courtesy.  But I wasn't entirely happy, because I usually have ever second of my day planned, and this was not one of them.  But I handled it graciously.

Yesterday, however, was different.  I work at different locations; some have computers, some don't.  The computer locations (when the computers are actually working), are fabulous.  However, this person came in to sub, not realizing that she would be the only one with me (first red flag).

I knew of her learning curve, but as the computers are easier, and she had already logged in, I felt that was a good enough sign to be there if I was needed.

It was a bit of a struggle through the meeting, but we got through.  After we closed the doors to the first meeting to settle up the info on the computer......that's when it happened.  I realized just how untrained this person was.

Let me just say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!

I realized, I lost half of my meetings info to the second meeting and our money was totally off.  This was a big pain in the rump.

Now....I can handle mistakes, because I have made plenty.  What I cannot handle.....is someone's actions affect your time, and pay and present you with a lax attitude because they screwed up.  (stand back, cuz here it comes).

In looking back on this situation, I realized that my reaction was directly related to her reaction, or lack there of, for what she had done.  She not only couldn't do the job effectively, she didn't realize the multitude of people this affected.  Everything from my pay (and hers) to my reports (how I am judged for my performance) as well as inventory. 

When one person crafts a boat, they take pride in their every step.  If they do something wrong, the boat sinks.  So it would behoove them to take pride and act very carefully.  They also want it to look good, as this represents who they are.  They want the boat to float and look good.

My job is my boat.

Yesterday after the first meeting, I felt like a hurricane came through, smashed up my boat, and left without a care.

As we discussed the meeting and how anything could possibly go wrong, our voices elevated.  As her attitude seemed so remorseless, I got angrier.  Pretty soon, names were being called (not by me) and tears were flowing (not mine). It was not a pretty day.  I have never ever been in that position before.  I hate being in that position.

She almost left before the next meeting started.  I told her she was stuck until we got through it.

Then....the remorse started flowing (mine). 

Though I did not throw any names, because this is not personal, this is a job, I regretted that it got to this level.  But I later realized, that when you are talking to someone who doesn't get it on pretty much any level, you work harder to drive your point home.  I was simply trying to let this person know that her actions are a ripple in a pond, and the whole pond is affected.  I also explained to her, that had I realized how uneducated she was, I would have stood near her more closely and helped her more.  But as she never blinked, I didn't think there was a problem.

I apologized profusely, for getting her so upset.  And I assured her I would never be that way again.  I told her that now I know where she is coming from, I will narrate my every move to help her learn.  She is a delightful person, I have nothing personal against her, I promise you. 

But when you mess with my boat, I have no other option than to protect it so it won't sink.

So....what would I change from this experience?  I will ask way more questions when paired with someone I don't know.  I will stand closer to them and let them know to not hesitate to ask me questions.
I will be nicer.

If we don't learn from our mistakes, we are doomed to repeat them.  By the end of our experience together, I think we learned a lot about ourselves.  I'm pretty sure she will never work with me again, but if she does, I will make it a pleasant experienece, because  I am more aware now.

I always tell my members.....Awareness is key!!!

Happy Wednesday!