Lowering expectations

I was so proud of myself yesterday for finishing all that I had on my list.  It really bugs me that when I need to be efficient; I can bring it.  But when I don’t have a deadline, I am hard-pressed to finish anything.

I am guessing it’s the fire that’s lit when something “needs” to be done. 

I have a friend who has a lot on her plate ALL THE TIME.  So much so, that when I call her, I have already practiced in my head what I want to say, so I can say it with the utmost speed, because IF she answers, she will likely be in the middle of something, and I’ll have 5 seconds to spit it out and get my point across, so I say it really fast.

When someone at school needs something, she is the one they go to.  If you want something done; ask a busy person, right?

I asked her one time why she was so busy all the time and why she doesn’t want to slow down.  She said, “Cuz then I’ll have to look at my life”.

That resonated so loudly with me, because I too, have felt the same way.

We busy ourselves with “stuff” and make it seem super important so we don’t have to face ourselves. 

For years I have heard about meditation.  Before kids; I thought, NO WAY!  I could never sit down quietly for 20 minutes, let alone 10 or even 5.  The thought seemed impossible.

Now that I have children a husband, two dogs and two jobs, I revel in the quiet moments.  When my husband is gone and the kids are at school, I can sit at my desk for hours, editing pictures and have no sounds on at all.   I think to put on some music, but it often tends to get in the way of the quiet peace in my brain.

When I do put on music, it’s probably something I have heard a million times over and over and over so it’s become mere filler when I’m trying to drown out other sounds.

I enjoy the quiet.  I don’t get it very often.

In the chaos of yesterday, I was surprised to see what I was able to power out in what seemed like a short amount of time.  I was focused.  That is another thing that doesn’t happen very often.

I still have a lot to accomplish by Monday.  I’m not sure I will finish it all, because once again, extra things have been thrown on my plate.  My house has been picked up and is closer to ready for visitors, but not totally there.  That will take a lot of work, and will likely get pushed off my plate.  I will go from the expectations of cleaning and organizing, down to pushing everything aside just to make room.

I have a priority list and I’m still behind on some items.  But I’m thinkin’ I’ll get done the best I can.  I will just lower my expectations in the process. 

After all….lowering expectations has kept me my sanity all these years.  It’s something my husband just doesn’t understand….. but that’s another blog.

Happy Thursday!