What I am not

My favorite question is,

Do you remember????

I don't know why people bother to ask me that question in ANY form!  I do remember.....until I don't! 
I remember most EVERYONE' birthday.  Just not on THAT day!!!  I have boyfriends from high school....still remember their birthdays.  Friends, I know most of their birthdays.  Hubby - check, kids - check, mom - check, dad - check, siblings etc....check check check!  But on that day...don't wait for the phone to ring from me....just sayin'!

Some people are very good at remembering every detail, and they are VERY good at following up on those details.  I'm not some people......And I get frustrated when people expect things of me and I don't deliver.

Did I ever tell you about the time I forgot to invite my mom to Mothers Day Brunch?  I called her the day before.  Luckily....she was free!

My husband once asked my why I ordered olives on a pizza.  I said, I like them, why?  He said "I don't!  Have you EVER seen me order olives?"    Honestly, my love....I never paid attention to that!

If I go somewhere and order food for the family, I have to call my husband and ask him what the kids will eat.  I don't have any idea, I never pay attention, because it is not something I can keep in my brain very long.  It's too much info and it changes too fast.  It's not my thing to remember!

I got yelled at once, because I gave my friends accolades and not my best friend.  In this instance I was bothered.  If I spend my every day or week talking to my friend, why do I need to tell her how I feel?  Don't my actions speak loud enough?  Apparently not.  But once again, I don't pay attention to those things. 

We are coming up on the girls birthdays.  It is my least favorite time of the year.  I know I wrote about this last year.  And I know I am not alone in this.........

Their birthdays bring me so much anxiety, that I cannot be bothered with it. 

Yes....I am a mother....and I just said that!

If it were up to me, I would spend the day, taking my girls to Disneyland, or Farrells, or somewhere fun, where we could celebrate as a family.  I would have family over for one night for both girls (as they are a week apart) and be done with it.

But my girls want the moon and everything under it when it comes to their birthdays. 

They want to invite friends.  But those who don't get invited get their feelings hurt....and that is what kills me.

I don't have enough money for their high hopes.  I don't have enough energy to negotiate to lower their hopes.

This year, I negotiated with them.....either a party, OR a Disney Pass.  This was a struggle for them.  Avery wanted both.  So, she is trying to plan her own birthday party with the few dollars she has in her possession, so she can have both.  BUT....what she doesn't realize, is there is still a ton of effort on MY  part to make that happen. 

So.....how do you negotiate?

Avery's birthday is in 2 days.  We have nothing planned - as yet.

For her birthday, I want her to feel special, but I am crippled as to how that will happen.  And Chris keeps asking if I have anything planned, and snubs his nose every time I tell him NO!!!  I'm thinking HE can help out here if he wants.  Why does it have to fall on me????

Am I alone in this?  If I'm a bad mom, fire away!  Maybe I need another point of view?

I have a friend who throws fantastic parties for her kids on a budget.  She has even made her own pinatas and dare I say.....they are better than the stores!!!

But, I am NOT that person!  I am a very different person.  I don't care for all the pomp and circumstance.  But it's not my birthday....and I am not 8 years old turning 9......or 10 years old turning 11.

Ughh.......my poor kids.

I spend so much time trying to get through my own stuff, that I forget that I'm responsible for them too - and all their activities and planning.  I can't plan to clean my own room.....how can I think of a party?

Can you feel my stress?

I know I will get through this.  But as for them....if they make a deal to get Disney Passes, should they still get a party?  Even if they pay themselves?  I think they want their cake and eat it too.  Not sure how to get through this one.  I like her initiative.  I'm not arguing that.  I'm just not sure which way to go on this.

We'll get through it, either way.  And when it is all said and done, I will ban them from talking about their next birthdays until June.  Just like I do every year. 

But for now....I'm hoping for the miracle birthday fairy to swoop in and cover all the details.

I can't give what I don't have....

Happy Sunday...... : /