Homework and sanity

If you keep up on my facebook page, you will see that homework has been bearing down on us like a slow avalanche slowly releasing itself down the mountain.

I'm not opposed to kids having homework, but when my kid comes home; asks to skip her 3 hour dance class so she can finish her project and is still up til almost 9:30, something has to be done!

Reluctantly this year, we put our daughter on Dance Team.  This requires quite a bit more than the 1 to 2 classes a year.  It's a bit more intensive, requiring all dance disciplines and is 3 hours a day, two days a week, and then Saturdays.

As I have watched my daughter all year, I can see  how dance has really helped in building her confidence and self esteem.  This has been my plan since she was a child.  To have her grow in a place of her peers in the same passion that she has.  And if you are lucky enough to find it in your life, then you really should go with it. 

Over the past few months, my child has been hitting burnout.  She's been enjoying things less and stressing more.  And she's only 10.  If she were struggling all year, that would be one thing; but she has been honestly mananging things so well, we've been surprised.  But, as they say, if it's too good to be true.....well, you know!


So, my question is; at what point - if at all - should a parent intervene?  Is it a good idea to send a note with a child?  Plan a meeting with the teacher?  Hunker down and just plan a place next to your child when they are struggling?  If a parent intervenes, is this a ticket to excuse-ville down the road for my child?  Will this affect her self esteem, or make her realize that I'm on her side?

As a parent, there are so many questions and not enough answers.  And as a parent, we don't usually realize we've botched things until hindsight comes in, which is really frustrating. 

So, what is a parent to do?  How far should I let my child slide down the hill, before I jump in and "try" and save the day?  And is it helping or hindering?

I'm not sure what the correct answer is.  I just know that, for me, as I watch my child decline on more than one level, it looks like a slippery slope to me.  When she starts getting sick, because she is up late so many nights, that maybe I can at least mention it to the teacher and see if there is something we can do to even out the workload!  I guess I'll find out later if it's a mistake.

After all...there is no handbook for this stuff......I guess I'll keep  ya posted.  But for now......I'm goin' in.....