A couple days ago I talked about pushing through the pain. And before that about True Friends. I'm very thankful for my friends and this morning I realized how strategically placed they all are!
Having two daughters, I do my best to emphasize to them that though a best friend is good; having many good friends is better! And I do my best to remind them, "You have to be a good friend to have a good friend".
I know who to go to in my life, depending on what my need is! If I need to eat better, I call my foodie friend. If I need to workout I go to my workout friends. If I have a "hate my husband day" (c'mon, I'm not alone in this one; he hates me too sometimes), then I have a few friends with whom I can commiserate. (And the best part is, THOSE friends usually come with a nice bottle of wine and many commiseration stories to make me realize I am SOOOO not alone!)
And then there is my personal favorite; the "I've really screwed up and I need someone to justify my actions!" friend. Those are probably the most important ones for us, because THEY are the ones who can talk us off the cliff before we jump!! (But IF we jump, they will justify it to everyone else on your dead behalf).
Now, I'm not here to belabor how I have such great friends. But I find that as a mom, dealing with daughters, I think back SO OFTEN to the many things I did wrong as a kid with my friends. And my girls are doing the very same things!!! In time, they will learn, just as I did!
However...things have changed a bit since WE were kids. Nowadays we have a "Label" for every issue out there in the world known to man! Kids don't have issues, they have "ADD, or they are "Autistic", "Dyslexic", "Emotionally Distant" "Overactive" "Spastic", "Regressing", "Aggressive" or whatever label you want to put on anyone is up to you. I don't care about labels so much. I don't mind diagnoses if they have a purpose, but sometimes we just STOP at the label as if there is nothing more to it. And that is a bummer! The bottom line is, we are all different and we have to learn to live together and work together and in some cases, "put up with each other".
I try to teach my girls that there are all different kinds of people in the world, and the sooner we can realize and accept that, the sooner we can open our minds to find out how we can actually "cope" with others. The best piece of advice I can remember from my mom when I started working: I came home from my very first "real" job and said, "There is this lady there who's really abrupt and rude". To which she replied, "Catherine, there's a prick in every bunch. You just have to learn to deal with them." I was 18 when she told me that and for EVERY job I have had since, I actually look and find that she is, in fact, correct. And guess who I am always the nicest and most obliging to? The Prick! It's always worked for me. I realize that they have their ways and I'm not going to change them. Usually makes for a good working relationship!
The bottom line is we are all different; but we all have our place. If we spend our time looking at the "label", will will negate the "person" standing behind the label. It's more important to spend your time looking for THEIR gift. After all, I think we all have something special to offer. If someone takes the time to look hard enough to find it.
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