I find that things stick with me until I figure them out! And I mean STICK with me! Not on the forefront, but in the back of my mind. For YEARS!!! And WHEN I figure them out there is usually some huge life-lesson attached to it.
Over the years I have fallen victim to wanting what others have. Not only is it NOT a smart thing to do, it's also considered a 'sin'! (sorry, raised Catholic, the guilt stays with you).
But as a 'watcher of life', I realized many things. First and foremost; 'AIN'T NOBODY GOT IT PERFECT HONEY'! Yep, I said it! Nobody has "THE PERFECT LIFE". I have found it doesn't exist. Because we are NEVER 100% happy! I don't think it's in our DNA. Now, we may have perfect MOMENTS, but those are fleeting and your best bet is to have a good memory and hold onto is as much as possible. For me, my memory is terrible, which is really sad. But my emotional memory is great! I don't remember what happened, but I DO remember how I FELT at certain times. And THAT, I can hold on to forever. A simple song can take me back to a feeling in an instant! As well as a certain smell from my childhood.
But, I digress. What does this have to do with other people? Well, a lot and nothing at all.
Thankfully, because I am an honest person, and I hold nothing back; I have found that this invites others to do the same. I am one of those lucky people who gets to hear the truth about other peoples' lives. And for this I am very very thankful. Because for those who don't have that gift, you are left wondering if others are living perfect lives.
Well, fear not! They aren't!!!
What I have found is that behind the perfect "exterior" of many relationships, there is some sort of turmoil (in different and varying degrees) that those "perfect" people are dealing with. Take a look at husbands and wives. Sure, they show up at the party on time, holding hands, kissing and snuggling. But what you may NOT see, is that when they get home, their issues arise again, and life goes on as normal. She's frustrated, because he keeps the toilet seat up, and he's angry that she hasn't done the dishes!
I have learned to be very careful about what I "think" I know about others. The truth is....you never REALLY do! And what does this matter???
Well, simply put, we ALL have our "bag" to deal with. Life is a journey. It's OUR journey! We came into this world alone and we will leave it the same way. What does YOUR journey say about YOU??? Does it say that you were too busy looking at your neighbors back yard, yearning for what they have? Or that you were present in every moment of YOUR life???
Last night, my daughter came in and asked me, "Mommy, why do people talk about there being a big earthquake in California?" It broke my heart and made me want to cry for the fear she was probably feeling. I brought her over to me and told her, "For as long as I can remember, there have been talks about tragedys that will be awful. And I have gotten caught up in the fear of it all for years. And do you know what happened? I lost YEARS of my life worrying about it! The truth is, we only have "right now" at any given time. We will all die, that is a fact of life. But it is more important to spend our days living and being the best we can and to pray to God to protect us." Then I told her how my anxieties have been really hard to deal with, but I found a mantra that works for "ME". I told her, "When I find myself worrying about the future and getting scared, I stop myself, and simply say, "I'm here now". And I repeat it until I feel better. That brings me back to the present".
We cannot control anything but ourselves. That is a fact of life! Oh, and that thing that stuck with me from my childhood was a mug that sat on my parents shelf. It used to bug me so much, because I didn't get it until one day in my late twenties....I finally understood its meaning and the life lesson behind it:
Just when you think you caught up with the Jones's ....they REFINANANCE!!! UGH.........
Look in your OWN backyard people. Happy Friday!
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