So I find myself having the same conversation over and over again.
When one is ready for something; does the other automatically get it too??? My younger one seems to think so... And I keep having the conversation that this is not the case.
And needless to say; she doesn't get it.
Aspen is 2 years older than Avery.
This year Aspen has been asked to submit a solo video for consideration for a solo, duo or trio. In the past we didn't do it for various reasons. This year, one of the teachers is trying to encourage me to submit for her. So I said yes.
Now, when you do a solo, duo, or trio - you are looking at dance above and beyond their regular schedule. And choreography and costumes and so forth and so on....
It's quite the consideration for a kid. (And the parents).
So to come to this conclusion for us is big.
The fun comes when we have to explain to Avery why SHE has to wait!!
Unfortunately, we kind of raised the girls for many years like they were twins. What one get, the other got. We didn't put much thought into it.
But now as they get older and one should get more privileges than the other, we have a fight on our hands. And total confusion.
I have said it before. Kids are growing up entitled - getting what they want - never having to earn - and emotionally empty. Not all, but many. As I become increasingly aware of this I'm doing my best to make more conscious decisions about it.
Aspen deserves to feel special because she is 2 years older. As I had this discussion with Avery, I could see that my past decisions were coming to haunt me. She just couldn't understand why we wouldn't consider her for a solo as well.
It's so funny as a parent how many times you live in hindsight. I have heard parents say, "If I had known how my kids would turn out; we wouldn't have had any". (I'm totally not kidding)
REALLY??????
Now, I know that child rearing is hard. But to look at your kids as a failure (2 for 2 I might add).... is there ANY slight possibility that the parents had ANYTHING to do with it????
I know all kids don't turn out perfect. I certainly didn't turn out like my dad thought. He wanted all highly educated children. College college college..... I was not a good student. College was not in the cards for me. And though some might consider that failure; my dad quickly realized I would trudge my own path and I would be fine. And when he died, I was married and pregnant with our first child and I believe he felt I would be okay!!!
But I am okay because of the lessons I learned as a kid.
I didn't always get what I wanted. I had to create my own fun. I lived in fear of my parents (because there was HELL to pay for making wrong choices) and I faced the consequences when I did stupid things!
I will never forget the time I got caught stealing something. My mom picked me up from the store; didn't say a word on the way home. (Silence from my mother was worse than Chinese water torture). And when I got home, I lingered outside....knowing what was behind the doors. When my dad came out to get me, he was taking off his belt (Gulp.....) "Catherine....get in here".
My brother was working on his car and he simply looked over at me without pulling his head out of the engine and said, "Good luck"....
(can you feel your stomach tightening?)
That was the worst feeling in the world.
Dad never used the belt on me. I don't think he intended to. Or maybe mom stopped him. But whatever the case that lesson was learned!!!! There were consequences for bad choices and we didn't want to face them.
And those lessons stuck as we got older.
That, to me is what childhood is about. We as parents can see the future more than our children. It is our job to think a few steps ahead and realize if we give our children EVERYTHING....they will eventually be empty inside because they don't have that victorious feeling of EARNING something!!!
I do hate having those conversations with my kids. I know Avery still doesn't get it and she thinks I like Aspen better. But it's not my job to make my kids happy. It's my job to make the best decisions for them even though they may not understand it!
I am the parent!!!
If I don't disappoint my kids at least once a day, I'm not doing my job!!
I know parents get tired and don't want to 'fight'....but no one said parenting is easy.
And I am not saying I am perfect. We will all screw up our kids and they will let us know how later. But like any other parents; we are doing the best we can. And if our kids actually take a look around, they will see that they don't have it so bad.
I'm pretty sure that my kids are aware of that.
Don't be afraid to disappoint your kids. They have friends.... they need parents!!
Happy Saturday
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Friday, July 27, 2012
To birthday...or NOT to birthday....
So, yesterday was incredibly productive. I got a lot done.
Some may say, "Yay you", but according to my older daughter I think I kind of failed.
As it was Avery's birthday; and she had her day planned (in her head), she woke up disappointed at the fact that she had to be dragged around with me to work. However, I smoothed it over with a quick trip to Starbucks.
As my day went on, I made it clear that until my work is done, no 'fun' will be had.
Now, am I a bad mom???
Taking off time here and there isn't usually a problem. But because of events that have come up; it's pushed my 'completion times' way back. Now, people who are waiting for their pictures are starting to get impatient, which makes ME look bad.
I don't like looking bad!
Last night (as a matter of fact) I had a nightmare that some of my clients were yelling at me. NOT a good feeling.
But I digress......
The "parties" have been set for the birthday's. And there are TWO of them. So my children will NOT go unnoticed, I promise you. It just so happens that on their birthday, the peacock feathers will be neatly tucked and stowed to wait for their celebration days!
As my day went on yesterday; there were two schools of thought:
1. The birthday person should be made a HUGE deal for the birthday child no matter the expense (including work and angry mobs).
2. As long as you have SOMETHING planned; it's okay to lay low on the actual birthday.
By the end of the day, I met that over the top mom who whoops and hollers all day on their kids birthday. And as this mom is perfectly adorable and likeable ( and her older teen children still adore her), I felt a bit like a failure.
When I was a kid (yes, I just said that), birthdays were quietly celebrated with family and moved on. It wasn't a big deal as I can remember. But it didn't totally go unnoticed either.
There were 5 of us. We were lucky to get fed for crimany sakes!!! Both my parents worked and we were lucky to get a "Hi" at the end of the day......
I grew up different than my husband, who was one of two - parents divorced, and probably got 2 birthday celebrations every year.
Needless to say; Hubby thinks I am the ANTI-birthday queen. I'm not in his good graces......
It's so funny when you live with someone and don't see eye to eye. As we were raised differently, he doesn't get what I went through and I can't fathom what he went through. But no offense to his mother, she fussed over him incessantly and now he does the same to the girls. It's cute at times, but other times, I feel like O.M.G........
That said, I think it's a good balance. He remembers the little things that I forget.
I keep telling him we are a good team with our totally different views. We keep each other in check.
But we will still likely screw up our kids, because that is what parents do; right???
When my kids are mad at me, I tell them, "I know I'm screwing up your life; and you will let me know exactly how later!!!" (they always blame the mom, right???)
And why is it always the mom's fault? Can you answer me that??? I think it's crap!! Mom's usually put in the most hands on hours with the intention of building our children up! I have yet to meet a mom that says, "I can't WAIT to screw up my child today!!"
Seriously!!!
But whatever.......
Avery got through her birthday and she had a cake (thank you Chris) and presents (thank you Chris).
And today we will meet at Farrells with a couple of her BFF's and celebrate again. Then on Sunday, when we have grandparents over.....we will celebrate yet again.....
My children aren't want for much. I'm seriously not worried about them. They will have bad memories of our child rearing no matter how hard we try. At least with something like birthdays I will remember and can start formulating my defense now.....
Happy Friday!
Some may say, "Yay you", but according to my older daughter I think I kind of failed.
As it was Avery's birthday; and she had her day planned (in her head), she woke up disappointed at the fact that she had to be dragged around with me to work. However, I smoothed it over with a quick trip to Starbucks.
As my day went on, I made it clear that until my work is done, no 'fun' will be had.
Now, am I a bad mom???
Taking off time here and there isn't usually a problem. But because of events that have come up; it's pushed my 'completion times' way back. Now, people who are waiting for their pictures are starting to get impatient, which makes ME look bad.
I don't like looking bad!
Last night (as a matter of fact) I had a nightmare that some of my clients were yelling at me. NOT a good feeling.
But I digress......
The "parties" have been set for the birthday's. And there are TWO of them. So my children will NOT go unnoticed, I promise you. It just so happens that on their birthday, the peacock feathers will be neatly tucked and stowed to wait for their celebration days!
As my day went on yesterday; there were two schools of thought:
1. The birthday person should be made a HUGE deal for the birthday child no matter the expense (including work and angry mobs).
2. As long as you have SOMETHING planned; it's okay to lay low on the actual birthday.
By the end of the day, I met that over the top mom who whoops and hollers all day on their kids birthday. And as this mom is perfectly adorable and likeable ( and her older teen children still adore her), I felt a bit like a failure.
When I was a kid (yes, I just said that), birthdays were quietly celebrated with family and moved on. It wasn't a big deal as I can remember. But it didn't totally go unnoticed either.
There were 5 of us. We were lucky to get fed for crimany sakes!!! Both my parents worked and we were lucky to get a "Hi" at the end of the day......
I grew up different than my husband, who was one of two - parents divorced, and probably got 2 birthday celebrations every year.
Needless to say; Hubby thinks I am the ANTI-birthday queen. I'm not in his good graces......
It's so funny when you live with someone and don't see eye to eye. As we were raised differently, he doesn't get what I went through and I can't fathom what he went through. But no offense to his mother, she fussed over him incessantly and now he does the same to the girls. It's cute at times, but other times, I feel like O.M.G........
That said, I think it's a good balance. He remembers the little things that I forget.
I keep telling him we are a good team with our totally different views. We keep each other in check.
But we will still likely screw up our kids, because that is what parents do; right???
When my kids are mad at me, I tell them, "I know I'm screwing up your life; and you will let me know exactly how later!!!" (they always blame the mom, right???)
And why is it always the mom's fault? Can you answer me that??? I think it's crap!! Mom's usually put in the most hands on hours with the intention of building our children up! I have yet to meet a mom that says, "I can't WAIT to screw up my child today!!"
Seriously!!!
But whatever.......
Avery got through her birthday and she had a cake (thank you Chris) and presents (thank you Chris).
And today we will meet at Farrells with a couple of her BFF's and celebrate again. Then on Sunday, when we have grandparents over.....we will celebrate yet again.....
My children aren't want for much. I'm seriously not worried about them. They will have bad memories of our child rearing no matter how hard we try. At least with something like birthdays I will remember and can start formulating my defense now.....
Happy Friday!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
My baby
Today is Avery's 10th birthday.
I can't tell you how my life has changed since she has arrived. I see her and I often think of my dad; because I know he would get the biggest kick out of her.
She's me. Only smaller.
When I was a kid, I was explosive. (don't laugh. It's true. I know it's hard to believe but just go with me on this).
First thing that took me by surprise is her red hair. People ask me all the time where she got it. I tell them from her "father". They say, "But Chris doesn't HAVE red hair". I look at them sideways and say, "No...HER father....." to which they give me a very strange look when they realize what I'm saying until I start laughing.
I can't help but use that one over and over again. No one expects it.
But she is ours. 100%.
From the first day she arrived; she knew what she wanted. Only we weren't prepared for it. She's kind of a go-getter. She gets things in her mind and they MUST happen!!!
I do love that about her, but it tends to make her a little inflexible.
Dessert didn't exist in this house until she came along. Every night after dinner if I tell her it's time for bed her response is simply, "But I didn't get dessert yet!"
And as today is her birthday she believes that NO ONE in her life should have to work. She wants to take the day off and would like us all to join her in her celebration.
And as her mother I do agree. Birthdays should be celebrated. Life should stop for the birthday person and they should get everything they want! EVERYTHING!!!
Unfortunately life doesn't work that way. And there, inlies the rub.......
I have a photo shoot first thing this morning. Thankfully, she is okay with that. If we go to Starbucks on the way for her special breakfast, all will be forgiven. I told her we would have to wake extra early to do so and she simple said, "I don't care!"
She also wants her hair curly. She will look special on her birthday. It's in her mind. It will happen. Her hair was done last night and when she wakes up we will see what we created. A birthday girl with the curl.
She's taught me a lot. As her mom, I have learned much patience, seen much laughter, and dried many a tear. I have gotten big bad squeezy hugs and wet kisses.
She reminds me about living passionately. She is nothing if not passionate about what she wants.
She can laugh like no other and she is quite amazing with children. That is one thing that throws me. She can tumble with the best of them in a fight yet when it comes to little ones; she's just perfect.
I am happy to celebrate my beautiful little redhead on her birthday.
Avery, you remind me where I come from and who I was. You teach me to listen and to be present. You are amazing and I love all that you are and all that you will become.
My wish for you this birthday is that you feel celebrated. You are unique, beautiful and I love you very much!!!
Happy Birthday to my fiery redhead!
Love Mommy
I can't tell you how my life has changed since she has arrived. I see her and I often think of my dad; because I know he would get the biggest kick out of her.
She's me. Only smaller.
First thing that took me by surprise is her red hair. People ask me all the time where she got it. I tell them from her "father". They say, "But Chris doesn't HAVE red hair". I look at them sideways and say, "No...HER father....." to which they give me a very strange look when they realize what I'm saying until I start laughing.
I can't help but use that one over and over again. No one expects it.
But she is ours. 100%.
From the first day she arrived; she knew what she wanted. Only we weren't prepared for it. She's kind of a go-getter. She gets things in her mind and they MUST happen!!!
I do love that about her, but it tends to make her a little inflexible.
Dessert didn't exist in this house until she came along. Every night after dinner if I tell her it's time for bed her response is simply, "But I didn't get dessert yet!"
And as today is her birthday she believes that NO ONE in her life should have to work. She wants to take the day off and would like us all to join her in her celebration.
And as her mother I do agree. Birthdays should be celebrated. Life should stop for the birthday person and they should get everything they want! EVERYTHING!!!
Unfortunately life doesn't work that way. And there, inlies the rub.......
I have a photo shoot first thing this morning. Thankfully, she is okay with that. If we go to Starbucks on the way for her special breakfast, all will be forgiven. I told her we would have to wake extra early to do so and she simple said, "I don't care!"
She also wants her hair curly. She will look special on her birthday. It's in her mind. It will happen. Her hair was done last night and when she wakes up we will see what we created. A birthday girl with the curl.
She's taught me a lot. As her mom, I have learned much patience, seen much laughter, and dried many a tear. I have gotten big bad squeezy hugs and wet kisses.
She reminds me about living passionately. She is nothing if not passionate about what she wants.
She can laugh like no other and she is quite amazing with children. That is one thing that throws me. She can tumble with the best of them in a fight yet when it comes to little ones; she's just perfect.
I am happy to celebrate my beautiful little redhead on her birthday.
Avery, you remind me where I come from and who I was. You teach me to listen and to be present. You are amazing and I love all that you are and all that you will become.
My wish for you this birthday is that you feel celebrated. You are unique, beautiful and I love you very much!!!
Happy Birthday to my fiery redhead!
Love Mommy
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Calling the game
I have decided to stay in bed today.
Yesterday didn't go so well. Today is not starting out so good either.
Sometimes you just gotta call the game.
I'm calling it!
I literally had ZERO wins!!! Nothing I did or said went right. And I went to bed far too late, so I added another loss.
I really hate days like that! You feel like an emotional punching bag. I was on the verge of tears all day. I was doing my best to keep it all to myself; but as I don't have a poker face, anyone who knew me saw the distress on my face.
I really need to work on that.
There are some people who go through life and you would never know their world is crumbling.
I get a hangnail and everyone can see something is 'off'.......
My dad suggested once that I be an actress. But after yesterday it's pretty clear, I couldn't pull it off.
I went to bed wondering if there was anything I could have done different all day long. And the answer is, though there was....it is unlikely that I would have changed anything. Because I have no control over my circumstances. Every choice I made was because I didn't have another choice.
It just so happened it all balled up into one really sucky day.
And as a result, I had a ball in my stomach that festered the night through.
This morning, within minutes something came out of my mouth which got me in trouble and I'm right back into 'sucky' mode.
So I have therefore decided to cut my losses for the day; HIDE and try again tomorrow. And something tells me my tomorrow is not looking up either. But I can only handle today.
So I hope your day goes well for you. I will be in seclusion.
Happy Wednesday.
Yesterday didn't go so well. Today is not starting out so good either.
Sometimes you just gotta call the game.
I'm calling it!
I literally had ZERO wins!!! Nothing I did or said went right. And I went to bed far too late, so I added another loss.
I really hate days like that! You feel like an emotional punching bag. I was on the verge of tears all day. I was doing my best to keep it all to myself; but as I don't have a poker face, anyone who knew me saw the distress on my face.
I really need to work on that.
There are some people who go through life and you would never know their world is crumbling.
I get a hangnail and everyone can see something is 'off'.......
My dad suggested once that I be an actress. But after yesterday it's pretty clear, I couldn't pull it off.
I went to bed wondering if there was anything I could have done different all day long. And the answer is, though there was....it is unlikely that I would have changed anything. Because I have no control over my circumstances. Every choice I made was because I didn't have another choice.
It just so happened it all balled up into one really sucky day.
And as a result, I had a ball in my stomach that festered the night through.
This morning, within minutes something came out of my mouth which got me in trouble and I'm right back into 'sucky' mode.
So I have therefore decided to cut my losses for the day; HIDE and try again tomorrow. And something tells me my tomorrow is not looking up either. But I can only handle today.
So I hope your day goes well for you. I will be in seclusion.
Happy Wednesday.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Back to the Desert
Hard to believe I went BACK to Palm Desert after my last declaration the last time I left...., "I don't want to come back here any time soon!!!".
I didn't know when I agreed to accompany the girl scout troop that I would end up smack dab in the middle of it again!!!
However, the trip was short and nice and very easy!!!
Yesterday, we spent the day at Soak City!! Now...there are two things I really don't care for: Walking around a bathing suit....and hanging out in the sun. And that's EXACTLY what we did!!!
I dreaded the idea at first. But when in Rome, you become a roman, so it was what it was. I donned the bathing suit and went for it.
It has been a SUPER EXTRA LONG TIME since I did anything like this. But I decided to go down those big tubes and plunge into the water. It was just as fun as I remembered.
We went from ride to ride, many over and over again and we had a really nice time.
My goal was to not get burned. But that didn't happen either. However, it's not as bad as it could have been, I saw some shiny lobsters at the end of the day!!!
The last ride of the day was what I call the funnel. It's a group thing where you can have 2 or 4 people in a large rafty-thing and you go down a huge tube that dumps you into a large funnel.....and you swirl around it until you go out the end, much like the water in a toilet! (Great visual, I know... but that is exactly what it is!!!!)
We went on that ride about 5 different times. The only bummer in the whole thing is you have to carry that raft up about 8 flights of stairs to get to the top!!! But it was TOTALLY worth it!
In the end, we had a fantastic day. The wave pool was hilarious. You could sit in 2 inches of waters or 5 ft of water depending where you wanted to stay. But when they waves started, you would get pushed around if you didn't stand your ground! When the waves first started, I laughed so hard that I ingested about a pint of water! I don't know why it was cracking me up, but with each wave that hit me in the face I laughed harder until I couldn't take it anymore!
It was a fun place to be and we all had a great day. The kids paired off and each did their own thing and so everyone was happy!!!
After that, we went back to the hotel, at a home-cooked dinner (something pre-made from the store that is) and chilled for the night.
Today we are back home and thankful for the nice 'cool' weather. Even though it was about 10 degrees cooler in Palm Springs than the last time I went, it was still about 105-109..... Just crazy hot!
Totally not my thing. So glad to be home!
Will cherish the memories forever!
Happy Tuesday!
I didn't know when I agreed to accompany the girl scout troop that I would end up smack dab in the middle of it again!!!
However, the trip was short and nice and very easy!!!
Yesterday, we spent the day at Soak City!! Now...there are two things I really don't care for: Walking around a bathing suit....and hanging out in the sun. And that's EXACTLY what we did!!!
I dreaded the idea at first. But when in Rome, you become a roman, so it was what it was. I donned the bathing suit and went for it.
It has been a SUPER EXTRA LONG TIME since I did anything like this. But I decided to go down those big tubes and plunge into the water. It was just as fun as I remembered.
We went from ride to ride, many over and over again and we had a really nice time.
My goal was to not get burned. But that didn't happen either. However, it's not as bad as it could have been, I saw some shiny lobsters at the end of the day!!!
The last ride of the day was what I call the funnel. It's a group thing where you can have 2 or 4 people in a large rafty-thing and you go down a huge tube that dumps you into a large funnel.....and you swirl around it until you go out the end, much like the water in a toilet! (Great visual, I know... but that is exactly what it is!!!!)
We went on that ride about 5 different times. The only bummer in the whole thing is you have to carry that raft up about 8 flights of stairs to get to the top!!! But it was TOTALLY worth it!
In the end, we had a fantastic day. The wave pool was hilarious. You could sit in 2 inches of waters or 5 ft of water depending where you wanted to stay. But when they waves started, you would get pushed around if you didn't stand your ground! When the waves first started, I laughed so hard that I ingested about a pint of water! I don't know why it was cracking me up, but with each wave that hit me in the face I laughed harder until I couldn't take it anymore!
It was a fun place to be and we all had a great day. The kids paired off and each did their own thing and so everyone was happy!!!
After that, we went back to the hotel, at a home-cooked dinner (something pre-made from the store that is) and chilled for the night.
Today we are back home and thankful for the nice 'cool' weather. Even though it was about 10 degrees cooler in Palm Springs than the last time I went, it was still about 105-109..... Just crazy hot!
Totally not my thing. So glad to be home!
Will cherish the memories forever!
Happy Tuesday!
Monday, July 23, 2012
Hiding and writing
Guess where I am? Go ahead...guess.....
In Palm Desert...in a hotel room....sitting on the bathroom floor.....writing my blog....
This is a first.
Why? You ask?
Because outside this door are 5 other bodies. Sleeping. And the light from my ipad illumintaes the room and i fear is just a little too much brightness, and I don't want to wake anyone, because I HATE being woken up before I absolutely have to get out of bed.
And as light will wake ME from sleep, I fear it will do the same for others....so I am sitting next to the toilet on the floor in the bathroom with the door closed.
Yes, I am weird.
We have a busy day scheduled that will start shortly. I am with a girlscout leader and four girlscouts, and we are celebrating their end of the year and are headed to Soak city today.
I was just here a few weeks ago with dance competitions. And I won't lie.... The thought of leaving this place brought me great joy, because sweltering heat does nothing for me.
So to be back wasn't exactly what I looked forward to. But to spend the day in the water will at least make it a little more bearable.
These girls have known each other since Kindergarten. It is really nice to see them all come together and pick up like no time has passed. Thanks to dance and other activities; we hardly see these girls. So it is really nice that they can have a weekend. Of time to get together and act like kids.
So though I won't be looking forward to the heat -OR wearing a bathing suit; I will look forward to spending a day doing something I would never otherwise plan for myself. And I will enjoy the TONs O FUN these kids will have today.
This girlscout leader happens to be a good friend. So I will further enjoy catching up with her, while I dunk her head under the water.
Happy Monday
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Reunion Day
So that's it. Just like that 25 years is over.
Yesterday the class of 1987 met at a park in Irvine. It was a casual setting, a little slow-going at first. But as people started to trickle in, it became more comfortable. People mingled from group to group and the kids played near by. It was so nice to see these people OFF facebook and in person.
Facebook is funny. It almost gives a false sense of security. You put something out there and people respond. So in that, I would expect that people start feeling safer to express themselves in ways they wouldn't do in person
But then you throw in a reunion....and everyone knows your 'business' because you yourself put it out there..... Yet when you actually have to face someone, it's a little different. Suddenly you become aware of all you have said, and you can't help but feel a little self conscious.
Or maybe that's just me!
I do put a lot on facebook. I'm not sure how that is perceived by others, but in truth, I have never been one to hide much of anything about myself. I YAM what I YAM.....
But what I do know is what I put out there in my mind is what I'm sayin. But I cannot control how someone takes that information. So when someone says, "Oh ya...I read that on your facebook page...." I tend to get a little worrisome. I usually examine their face to see if they have disdain, or amusement.
I admit it. It's a little nutty how much I put out there.
But do you know in the last few weeks how many people have said to me, "I read your blog, and I swear you were writing about ME!"
THAT'S my point!!!
We are all the same. Crazy people living crazy lives and doing our best to come together from time to time to check in.
So with our reunion yesterday, I have to say; there was a very comfortable feeling. It was easy.
Thankfully because of Facebook we don't have to say to each other; "So....what have you been up to these last few years... because we know. We can start the conversation with, "How are the kids?" or whatever floats your boat. But you get my drift.
In the evening we went to a bar to convene as adults. It was really nice. It was actually a smaller group than the park. I know at this time in our lives, it gets crazy and hard to make time. So I'm glad for those who had the time to drop in. And I really hope they enjoyed themselves, because it looks like they did.
I don't know why some people don't feel the need to go back. I feel like we are all on a journey in life and people are a part of that journey; shaping us to who we are. How nice to check in with them once in a while to see how their life is progressing.
We are nothing without the people who helped create us - good or bad.
It's still fun to talk old times (for what we can remember of them).
I had a good time yesterday. Putting actual faces to the facebook avatars was nice. I'm thankful to those who traveled to visit. I hope you found it worth your time and I will look forward to seeing you in another 5!!!
Happy Sunday
Yesterday the class of 1987 met at a park in Irvine. It was a casual setting, a little slow-going at first. But as people started to trickle in, it became more comfortable. People mingled from group to group and the kids played near by. It was so nice to see these people OFF facebook and in person.
Facebook is funny. It almost gives a false sense of security. You put something out there and people respond. So in that, I would expect that people start feeling safer to express themselves in ways they wouldn't do in person
But then you throw in a reunion....and everyone knows your 'business' because you yourself put it out there..... Yet when you actually have to face someone, it's a little different. Suddenly you become aware of all you have said, and you can't help but feel a little self conscious.
Or maybe that's just me!
I do put a lot on facebook. I'm not sure how that is perceived by others, but in truth, I have never been one to hide much of anything about myself. I YAM what I YAM.....
But what I do know is what I put out there in my mind is what I'm sayin. But I cannot control how someone takes that information. So when someone says, "Oh ya...I read that on your facebook page...." I tend to get a little worrisome. I usually examine their face to see if they have disdain, or amusement.
I admit it. It's a little nutty how much I put out there.
But do you know in the last few weeks how many people have said to me, "I read your blog, and I swear you were writing about ME!"
THAT'S my point!!!
We are all the same. Crazy people living crazy lives and doing our best to come together from time to time to check in.
So with our reunion yesterday, I have to say; there was a very comfortable feeling. It was easy.
Thankfully because of Facebook we don't have to say to each other; "So....what have you been up to these last few years... because we know. We can start the conversation with, "How are the kids?" or whatever floats your boat. But you get my drift.
In the evening we went to a bar to convene as adults. It was really nice. It was actually a smaller group than the park. I know at this time in our lives, it gets crazy and hard to make time. So I'm glad for those who had the time to drop in. And I really hope they enjoyed themselves, because it looks like they did.
I don't know why some people don't feel the need to go back. I feel like we are all on a journey in life and people are a part of that journey; shaping us to who we are. How nice to check in with them once in a while to see how their life is progressing.
We are nothing without the people who helped create us - good or bad.
It's still fun to talk old times (for what we can remember of them).
I had a good time yesterday. Putting actual faces to the facebook avatars was nice. I'm thankful to those who traveled to visit. I hope you found it worth your time and I will look forward to seeing you in another 5!!!
Happy Sunday
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